The Raw Diet aka the Gwyneth Paltrow

I am writing this on day two of next weeks diet, so if something doesn't make sense, please forgive me, I'm dying by cleanse over here... I'm also not feeling very funny

I had heard that Gwyneth Paltrow leads a pretty out there and eccentric life style but it wasn't until Matilda and I studied her a little closer did the craziness (and the hunger) start to rear their ugly heads
Apparently Gwyn doesn't use deodorant or soap and has all her clothing steam cleaned 3 times, to really get that stink out
She also uses a special clay toothpaste as not to ingest any harmful fluoride into her pure system

At first I thought, 'thats nice, Conservationist Gwyn is using her powers for good and doing something for the enviroment!'
Er, apparently not, according to a source, Gwyn has a fashion 'seasonal must have' list (which exceeds $200,000) and on there, somewhere is Valentino's rock stud python trapeze bag, which is $5,500....and made from pythons
Her weekly grocery shopping is over $300; which is kind of ironic for someone who restricts most things found at the supermarket....
For a special treat Gwyn will indulge in half a date or fig...
Right, so Gwynth's motives are purely vanity and self preservation

Gwyneth is also the author of her own cookbooks where she is kind enough to share all her tasty vegan and raw food friendly meals with us mere mortals
She often 'detoxes' from her usual crazy eating self, (one half a date too many I'd say) and goes on her strict raw food cleanse
On her blog, Gwyn proudly says that husband Chris and the kids Moses, 6 and Apple, 8, also participate happily in a good raw detox too... er, right
Apparently Apple really enjoys an apple..

"It's All Good" says Gwyn

What is that? 

Some sort of sick joke?

Matilda had heard about Gwyn's Raw Cleanse and all the fantastic health benefits that it had in store for her, so she was eager to try... 

What can you eat?

Anything raw or simple 

"Micro foods"

Infinite salad

Fruits

Nuts

Raw veggies

Raw fish and meat (yay)

Herbal tea and water 

(Gwyneth recommends you drink at least 3L of water a day to flush out any nasty toxins that might be hiding in the salad)

What's not allowed?

coffee, (boo) 

alcohol, (boo) 

artificial sweetener

banana chips

olives

glazed pineapple pieces

Cooked, frozen, dipped, dried, fried, steamed, boiled pretty much anything that makes food taste better... not allowed, not allowed, not allowed!! 

Gwyneth's basic rule is it should only be cut and washed before ingested

She also doesn't eat after 8pm and exercises using the Tracey Anderson method for 2 hours a day...

She also has time to work, go to Pilates and be a mum

Eat like that, look like this -

Blogger: Matilda

Duration: 5 days

Starting weight: 76.8kg

Day One

feeling optimistic and ready to cleanse!

Breakfast
1 banana
1 mandarin
handful of grapes
green tea

Lunch
1 avocado
1 apple
green tea

Dinner
Green salad leaves
1/4 avocado
1/4 capsicum

feeling tired but thought it was a good sustainable diet... for one day

Day Two

Breakfast

1 banana 

1 apple

green tea

Lunch

4 strawberries

some raw beans

1/4 avocado 

handful of spinach leaves

green tea

Dinner

1/2 a lettuce

1/2 a carrot

3 medium sized mushrooms 

some raw onion and pieces of broccoli

3 vodka and sodas with fresh lime

Feeling tired, exhausted, starting to loose concentration and had to count the till several times at work before getting it right -

Went out for a friends dinner and drank 3 vodkas to be social and take the edge off a bad mood

Day Three

Feeling good this morning! Strangely high and motivated

Breakfast

1 apple

1 banana 

Lunch

handful of kale

1 tomato

1/4 of an avocado

5 almonds

green tea

Crashed, totally exhausted, craving some sort of protein

Dinner

100gms of raw salmon dressed with lemon 

a green salad with oranges, mushrooms and capsicum

Day Four

Angry at apples, really missing coffee right now

Breakfast

half an avocado and some green beans smashed together (wonder if Gwyn has thought of this one yet?!)

Green tea

Lunch

12 blueberries

one apple

some raw beans 

4 green olives (not allowed)

5 almonds 

green tea

Dinner

green salad 

3 mushrooms

1/4 a handful of capsicum

1 orange

3 vodkas and soda with fresh lime

Tired and over it, had a micro sleep at work today whilst serving a customer 

Starting to obsess over weird things like eating those olives, doesn't want to be around other people that are eating normally

Need a drink to relax, so had 3 vodkas, (points awarded for raw lime)

Gwyneth has said that she prefers to live in Europe rather then America because there are too many fat people in the US consuming cooked and fatty foods around her

She says that there is a "bad energy" in her homeland and she's scared of picking up the local's bad eating habits

Day Five

Waking up feeling angry at apples and at a lack of variety in the diet, luckily is the last day

Breakfast

1 apple

1/2 a banana

Lunch

1 detox juice (with beetroot, celery, apple, ginger)

1 passionfruit

1 mandarin

Dinner

green salad 

100gms of raw salmon dressed with lemon and some spring onion

The girls went out for a normal friday night dinner, couldn't go, too tired, pale, irritable and felt unable to hold conversation

Went home to bed

The results:

End weight: 72.8kg

Total loss: 4kg

After two days of normal eating and drinking: 73.7kg 

Matilda put a kilo back on after just 2 days of normal 'healthy' eating....

The first morning off the diet she had a bowl of porridge and a boiled egg that made her stomach turn

"Could you stick to this diet long term?" I asked Matilda
"You can't function, you can't do your job properly and you have no social life because everyone else is enjoying food -
If it was a matter of life and death... or maybe for a day"

I bet that dress needed a good steam...

sources
http://www.goop.com/
http://www.fanpop.com/clubs/gwyneth-paltrow/images/23566539/title/gwyneth-paltrow-bikini-babe-with-apple-moses-photo
www.celebitch.com
www.therawdiet.com
www.newyorkpost.com

If you have a celebrity or fashion diet that you would like me or Matilda to try, please leave us a comment.....